I looked on my blogs the other day and was shocked to see a half naked lady across the screen. I had signed up for a company that pays you to advertise. I was suppose to be advertising for products. Sorry to those who may have seen it. It really is a Sign of the Times.
2 Timothy
3:1
This know also, that in the last days perilous times shall come.
3:2
For men shall be lovers of their own selves, covetous, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy,
3:3
Without natural affection, trucebreakers, false accusers, incontinent, fierce, despisers of those that are good,
3:4
Traitors, heady, highminded, lovers of pleasures more than lovers of God;
3:5
Having a form of godliness, but denying the power thereof: from such turn away.
3:6
For of this sort are they which creep into houses, and lead captive silly women laden with sins, led away with divers lusts
3:7
Ever learning, and never able to come to the knowledge of the truth.
Friday, September 25, 2009
True Worship Part 2
My children came home and told me that there was a rainbow outside and it looked like it was over our house. Then my husband invited me fishing and I knew it would be a good opportunity for reflection. I looked at the sky and it was like I kept seeing rainbows. Have you ever saw a rainbow at night? I knew that what I was seeing in the spirit but it was just so beautiful. As I sat on the bridge I looked up in the sky and I saw a few stars...I kept looking and it was as if the heavens opened up and God had sprinkled countless stars in the sky just for me. God is like that; he shows us glimpses of himself and the more we look the more of himself he reveals.,Psalms 14:2 The LORD looked down from heaven upon the children of men, to see if there were any that did understand, [and] seek God.
True Worship Part 1
God led me to study worship and then during a meeting my pastor said that he was getting ready to teach on worship and it made me feel that this message was something God wanted to share with the Body of Christ and I decided to post my studies.God began to lead me in a way different from what I expected. I guess to the foundations of worship.
Leviticus 8:1
8:1 And the LORD spake unto Moses, saying,
8:2 Take Aaron and his sons with him, and the garments, and the anointing oil, and a bullock for the sin offering, and two rams, and a basket of unleavened bread;
8:3 And gather thou all the congregation together unto the door of the tabernacle of the congregation.
8:4 And Moses did as the LORD commanded him; and the assembly was gathered together unto the door of the tabernacle of the congregation.
8:5 And Moses said unto the congregation, This [is] the thing which the LORD commanded to be done.
8:6 And Moses brought Aaron and his sons, and washed them with water.
8:7 And he put upon him the coat, and girded him with the girdle, and clothed him with the robe, and put the ephod upon him, and he girded him with the curious girdle of the ephod, and bound [it] unto him therewith.
8:8 And he put the breastplate upon him: also he put in the breastplate the Urim and the Thummim.
8:9 And he put the mitre upon his head; also upon the mitre, [even] upon his forefront, did he put the golden plate, the holy crown; as the LORD commanded Moses.
8:10 And Moses took the anointing oil, and anointed the tabernacle and all that [was] therein, and sanctified them.
8:11 And he sprinkled thereof upon the altar seven times, and anointed the altar and all his vessels, both the laver and his foot, to sanctify them.
8:12 And he poured of the anointing oil upon Aaron's head, and anointed him, to sanctify him.
8:13 And Moses brought Aaron's sons, and put coats upon them, and girded them with girdles, and put bonnets upon them; as the LORD commanded Moses.
8:14 And he brought the bullock for the sin offering: and Aaron and his sons laid their hands upon the head of the bullock for the sin offering.
8:15 And he slew [it]; and Moses took the blood, and put [it] upon the horns of the altar round about with his finger, and purified the altar, and poured the blood at the bottom of the altar, and sanctified it, to make reconciliation upon it.
8:16 And he took all the fat that [was] upon the inwards, and the caul [above] the liver, and the two kidneys, and their fat, and Moses burned [it] upon the altar.
8:17 But the bullock, and his hide, his flesh, and his dung, he burnt with fire without the camp; as the LORD commanded Moses.
8:18 And he brought the ram for the burnt offering: and Aaron and his sons laid their hands upon the head of the ram.
8:19 And he killed [it]; and Moses sprinkled the blood upon the altar round about.
8:20 And he cut the ram into pieces; and Moses burnt the head, and the pieces, and the fat.
8:21 And he washed the inwards and the legs in water; and Moses burnt the whole ram upon the altar: it [was] a burnt sacrifice for a sweet savour, [and] an offering made by fire unto the LORD; as the LORD commanded Moses.
8:22 And he brought the other ram, the ram of consecration: and Aaron and his sons laid their hands upon the head of the ram.
8:23 And he slew [it]; and Moses took of the blood of it, and put [it] upon the tip of Aaron's right ear, and upon the thumb of his right hand, and upon the great toe of his right foot.
8:24 And he brought Aaron's sons, and Moses put of the blood upon the tip of their right ear, and upon the thumbs of their right hands, and upon the great toes of their right feet: and Moses sprinkled the blood upon the altar round about.
8:25 And he took the fat, and the rump, and all the fat that [was] upon the inwards, and the caul [above] the liver, and the two kidneys, and their fat, and the right shoulder:
8:26 And out of the basket of unleavened bread, that [was] before the LORD, he took one unleavened cake, and a cake of oiled bread, and one wafer, and put [them] on the fat, and upon the right shoulder:
8:27 And he put all upon Aaron's hands, and upon his sons' hands, and waved them [for] a wave offering before the LORD.
8:28 And Moses took them from off their hands, and burnt [them] on the altar upon the burnt offering: they [were] consecrations for a sweet savour: it [is] an offering made by fire unto the LORD.
8:29 And Moses took the breast, and waved it [for] a wave offering before the LORD: [for] of the ram of consecration it was Moses' part; as the LORD commanded Moses.
8:30 And Moses took of the anointing oil, and of the blood which [was] upon the altar, and sprinkled [it] upon Aaron, [and] upon his garments, and upon his sons, and upon his sons' garments with him; and sanctified Aaron, [and] his garments, and his sons, and his sons' garments with him.
8:31 And Moses said unto Aaron and to his sons, Boil the flesh [at] the door of the tabernacle of the congregation: and there eat it with the bread that [is] in the basket of consecrations, as I commanded, saying, Aaron and his sons shall eat it.
8:32 And that which remaineth of the flesh and of the bread shall ye burn with fire.
8:33 And ye shall not go out of the door of the tabernacle of the congregation [in] seven days, until the days of your consecration be at an end: for seven days shall he consecrate you.
8:34 As he hath done this day, [so] the LORD hath commanded to do, to make an atonement for you.
8:35 Therefore shall ye abide [at] the door of the tabernacle of the congregation day and night seven days, and keep the charge of the LORD, that ye die not: for so I am commanded.
8:36 So Aaron and his sons did all things which the LORD commanded by the hand of Moses.
What I gleaned from this study to be key was 7 days of consecration; blood sacrifice; blood sacrifice; and being ordained for the priesthood.
Leviticus 8:1
8:1 And the LORD spake unto Moses, saying,
8:2 Take Aaron and his sons with him, and the garments, and the anointing oil, and a bullock for the sin offering, and two rams, and a basket of unleavened bread;
8:3 And gather thou all the congregation together unto the door of the tabernacle of the congregation.
8:4 And Moses did as the LORD commanded him; and the assembly was gathered together unto the door of the tabernacle of the congregation.
8:5 And Moses said unto the congregation, This [is] the thing which the LORD commanded to be done.
8:6 And Moses brought Aaron and his sons, and washed them with water.
8:7 And he put upon him the coat, and girded him with the girdle, and clothed him with the robe, and put the ephod upon him, and he girded him with the curious girdle of the ephod, and bound [it] unto him therewith.
8:8 And he put the breastplate upon him: also he put in the breastplate the Urim and the Thummim.
8:9 And he put the mitre upon his head; also upon the mitre, [even] upon his forefront, did he put the golden plate, the holy crown; as the LORD commanded Moses.
8:10 And Moses took the anointing oil, and anointed the tabernacle and all that [was] therein, and sanctified them.
8:11 And he sprinkled thereof upon the altar seven times, and anointed the altar and all his vessels, both the laver and his foot, to sanctify them.
8:12 And he poured of the anointing oil upon Aaron's head, and anointed him, to sanctify him.
8:13 And Moses brought Aaron's sons, and put coats upon them, and girded them with girdles, and put bonnets upon them; as the LORD commanded Moses.
8:14 And he brought the bullock for the sin offering: and Aaron and his sons laid their hands upon the head of the bullock for the sin offering.
8:15 And he slew [it]; and Moses took the blood, and put [it] upon the horns of the altar round about with his finger, and purified the altar, and poured the blood at the bottom of the altar, and sanctified it, to make reconciliation upon it.
8:16 And he took all the fat that [was] upon the inwards, and the caul [above] the liver, and the two kidneys, and their fat, and Moses burned [it] upon the altar.
8:17 But the bullock, and his hide, his flesh, and his dung, he burnt with fire without the camp; as the LORD commanded Moses.
8:18 And he brought the ram for the burnt offering: and Aaron and his sons laid their hands upon the head of the ram.
8:19 And he killed [it]; and Moses sprinkled the blood upon the altar round about.
8:20 And he cut the ram into pieces; and Moses burnt the head, and the pieces, and the fat.
8:21 And he washed the inwards and the legs in water; and Moses burnt the whole ram upon the altar: it [was] a burnt sacrifice for a sweet savour, [and] an offering made by fire unto the LORD; as the LORD commanded Moses.
8:22 And he brought the other ram, the ram of consecration: and Aaron and his sons laid their hands upon the head of the ram.
8:23 And he slew [it]; and Moses took of the blood of it, and put [it] upon the tip of Aaron's right ear, and upon the thumb of his right hand, and upon the great toe of his right foot.
8:24 And he brought Aaron's sons, and Moses put of the blood upon the tip of their right ear, and upon the thumbs of their right hands, and upon the great toes of their right feet: and Moses sprinkled the blood upon the altar round about.
8:25 And he took the fat, and the rump, and all the fat that [was] upon the inwards, and the caul [above] the liver, and the two kidneys, and their fat, and the right shoulder:
8:26 And out of the basket of unleavened bread, that [was] before the LORD, he took one unleavened cake, and a cake of oiled bread, and one wafer, and put [them] on the fat, and upon the right shoulder:
8:27 And he put all upon Aaron's hands, and upon his sons' hands, and waved them [for] a wave offering before the LORD.
8:28 And Moses took them from off their hands, and burnt [them] on the altar upon the burnt offering: they [were] consecrations for a sweet savour: it [is] an offering made by fire unto the LORD.
8:29 And Moses took the breast, and waved it [for] a wave offering before the LORD: [for] of the ram of consecration it was Moses' part; as the LORD commanded Moses.
8:30 And Moses took of the anointing oil, and of the blood which [was] upon the altar, and sprinkled [it] upon Aaron, [and] upon his garments, and upon his sons, and upon his sons' garments with him; and sanctified Aaron, [and] his garments, and his sons, and his sons' garments with him.
8:31 And Moses said unto Aaron and to his sons, Boil the flesh [at] the door of the tabernacle of the congregation: and there eat it with the bread that [is] in the basket of consecrations, as I commanded, saying, Aaron and his sons shall eat it.
8:32 And that which remaineth of the flesh and of the bread shall ye burn with fire.
8:33 And ye shall not go out of the door of the tabernacle of the congregation [in] seven days, until the days of your consecration be at an end: for seven days shall he consecrate you.
8:34 As he hath done this day, [so] the LORD hath commanded to do, to make an atonement for you.
8:35 Therefore shall ye abide [at] the door of the tabernacle of the congregation day and night seven days, and keep the charge of the LORD, that ye die not: for so I am commanded.
8:36 So Aaron and his sons did all things which the LORD commanded by the hand of Moses.
What I gleaned from this study to be key was 7 days of consecration; blood sacrifice; blood sacrifice; and being ordained for the priesthood.
Sunday, September 20, 2009
Flowing Waters
During church service on yesterday I saw a vision of smoke covered moutains with water flowing through them and I heard "there is a river". I looked up the phrase "there is a river" and my search led me to Psalm 46
Psalms 46
46:1 God [is] our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble.,br> 46:2 Therefore will not we fear, though the earth be removed, and though the mountains be carried into the midst of the sea;
46:3 [Though] the waters thereof roar [and] be troubled, [though] the mountains shake with the swelling thereof. Selah.
46:4 [There is] a river, the streams whereof shall make glad the city of God, the holy [place] of the tabernacles of the most High.
46:5 God [is] in the midst of her; she shall not be moved: God shall help her, [and that] right early.
Sunday, September 6, 2009
I Found A Church
1 Thessalonians
5:11 Wherefore comfort yourselves together, and edify one another, even as also ye do.
5:12 And we beseech you, brethren, to know them which labour among you, and are over you in the Lord, and admonish you;
5:13 And to esteem them very highly in love for their work's sake. [And] be at peace among yourselves.
5:14 Now we exhort you, brethren, warn them that are unruly, comfort the feebleminded, support the weak, be patient toward all [men].
5:15 See that none render evil for evil unto any [man]; but ever follow that which is good, both among yourselves, and to all [men].
5:16 Rejoice evermore.
5:17 Pray without ceasing.
5:18 In every thing give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you.
5:19 Quench not the Spirit.
5:20 Despise not prophesyings.
5:21 Prove all things; hold fast that which is good.
Last Sunday, I joined a church. I had gone a few times but I had not made up my mind to join; you see things are done differently than I am accustomed to in this church but every time that I have gone I have felt the presence of God. Last Sunday during service the pastor opened the doors of membership. I battled within myself as to whether or not to join and then I heard the voice of God tell me that my deliverance was in this church, so I politely got up and walked myself to the alter...Amen. It feels good to back in the fold.
5:11 Wherefore comfort yourselves together, and edify one another, even as also ye do.
5:12 And we beseech you, brethren, to know them which labour among you, and are over you in the Lord, and admonish you;
5:13 And to esteem them very highly in love for their work's sake. [And] be at peace among yourselves.
5:14 Now we exhort you, brethren, warn them that are unruly, comfort the feebleminded, support the weak, be patient toward all [men].
5:15 See that none render evil for evil unto any [man]; but ever follow that which is good, both among yourselves, and to all [men].
5:16 Rejoice evermore.
5:17 Pray without ceasing.
5:18 In every thing give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you.
5:19 Quench not the Spirit.
5:20 Despise not prophesyings.
5:21 Prove all things; hold fast that which is good.
Last Sunday, I joined a church. I had gone a few times but I had not made up my mind to join; you see things are done differently than I am accustomed to in this church but every time that I have gone I have felt the presence of God. Last Sunday during service the pastor opened the doors of membership. I battled within myself as to whether or not to join and then I heard the voice of God tell me that my deliverance was in this church, so I politely got up and walked myself to the alter...Amen. It feels good to back in the fold.
Saturday, September 5, 2009
Don't Eat Your Seed It Won't Fill You Up!
Malachi
3:8 Will a man rob God? Yet ye have robbed me. But ye say, Wherein have we robbed thee? In tithes and offerings.
3:9 Ye [are] cursed with a curse: for ye have robbed me, [even] this whole nation.
3:10 Bring ye all the tithes into the storehouse, that there may be meat in mine house, and prove me now herewith, saith the LORD of hosts, if I will not open you the windows of heaven, and pour you out a blessing, that [there shall] not [be room] enough [to receive it].
3:11 And I will rebuke the devourer for your sakes, and he shall not destroy the fruits of your ground; neither shall your vine cast her fruit before the time in the field, saith the LORD of hosts.
3:12 And all nations shall call you blessed: for ye shall be a delightsome land, saith the LORD of hosts.
Today while in the mall I saw a cute shirt. I didn't have much money and I had already had an impression on my heart to give an offering of what I had but the shirt was soooo cute that I began to waiver in my decision to give what I had as an offering and buying the shirt. I then felt in my spirit that if I bought the shirt I would be walking in disobedience. I decided I didn't want that so I left the store. While leaving the store and getting ready to go to my car I felt a assurance in my spirit that my decision tonight will lead to my being able to by many cute shirts. Here recently God has been having me to sow my last (I'm expecting a widow's mite anointing but I will live and not die and declare the works of the Lord); my flesh kicks against this new thing very hard but then reality sets in. What I have isn't enough anyway. Now I'm not encouraging people to take their mortgage money and put it in the offering bowl on Sunday. But I am encouraging you to tithe and give an offering and when God impresses it upon your heart to give a specific amount to do it. The Lord is faithful, he will provide.
3:8 Will a man rob God? Yet ye have robbed me. But ye say, Wherein have we robbed thee? In tithes and offerings.
3:9 Ye [are] cursed with a curse: for ye have robbed me, [even] this whole nation.
3:10 Bring ye all the tithes into the storehouse, that there may be meat in mine house, and prove me now herewith, saith the LORD of hosts, if I will not open you the windows of heaven, and pour you out a blessing, that [there shall] not [be room] enough [to receive it].
3:11 And I will rebuke the devourer for your sakes, and he shall not destroy the fruits of your ground; neither shall your vine cast her fruit before the time in the field, saith the LORD of hosts.
3:12 And all nations shall call you blessed: for ye shall be a delightsome land, saith the LORD of hosts.
Today while in the mall I saw a cute shirt. I didn't have much money and I had already had an impression on my heart to give an offering of what I had but the shirt was soooo cute that I began to waiver in my decision to give what I had as an offering and buying the shirt. I then felt in my spirit that if I bought the shirt I would be walking in disobedience. I decided I didn't want that so I left the store. While leaving the store and getting ready to go to my car I felt a assurance in my spirit that my decision tonight will lead to my being able to by many cute shirts. Here recently God has been having me to sow my last (I'm expecting a widow's mite anointing but I will live and not die and declare the works of the Lord); my flesh kicks against this new thing very hard but then reality sets in. What I have isn't enough anyway. Now I'm not encouraging people to take their mortgage money and put it in the offering bowl on Sunday. But I am encouraging you to tithe and give an offering and when God impresses it upon your heart to give a specific amount to do it. The Lord is faithful, he will provide.
Wednesday, August 26, 2009
Pray Without Ceasing
Matthew 19:14
But Jesus said, Suffer little children, and forbid them not, to come unto me: for of such is the kingdom of heaven.
Friday, August 21, 2009
A Word of Ecouragement
Spring (A poem by Whosethatlady)After the dead cold of winter spring brings forth new life
Just rewards for trials and strife
beautiful gifts that winter tried to kill
bloom and blossom as they shake off the chill
grass that was brown and withered
Now clothed in brilliant green
Flowers and birds of vast species to be seen
trees once whipped bare by winter's icy breeze
now overflowing with an abundance of leaves
winter thought it had defeated me
my end it thought it had seen
then I bloomed and blossemed in the glory of spring
Leviticus 26:4
Then I will give you rain in due season, and the land shall yield her increase, and the trees of the field shall yield their fruit.
Numbers 28:2
Command the children of Israel, and say unto them, My offering, [and] my bread for my sacrifices made by fire, [for] a sweet savour unto me, shall ye observe to offer unto me in their due season.
Psalms 104:27
These wait all upon thee; that thou mayest give [them] their meat in due season.
Psalms 145:15
The eyes of all wait upon thee; and thou givest them their meat in due season.
Proverbs 15:23
A man hath joy by the answer of his mouth: and a word [spoken] in due season, how good [is it]!
Ecclesiastes 10:17
Blessed [art] thou, O land, when thy king [is] the son of nobles, and thy princes eat in due season, for strength, and not for drunkenness!
Matthew 24:45
Who then is a faithful and wise servant, whom his lord hath made ruler over his household, to give them meat in due season?
Luke 12:42
And the Lord said, Who then is that faithful and wise steward, whom [his] lord shall make ruler over his household, to give [them their] portion of meat in due season?
Galatians 6:9
And let us not be weary in well doing: for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not.
Psalm 30:5
For his anger [endureth but] a moment; in his favour [is] life: weeping may endure for a night, but joy [cometh] in the morning.
Hebrews 10:37
For yet a little while, and he that shall come will come, and will not tarry.
Jeremiah 29:11
For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the LORD, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected
Thursday, August 6, 2009
Exceeding Abundantly
Ephesians 3:20
Now unto him that is able to do exceeding abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that worketh in usI am writing this post as a pledge...I will not shrink myself to fit in the box that others would put me in! I will be all that God has called and destined me to be.
I would like to share a poem that I like with you.
Our Deepest Fear
By Marianne Williamson
Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.
It is our light, not our darkness
That most frightens us.
We ask ourselves
Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?
Actually, who are you not to be?
You are a child of God.
Your playing small
Does not serve the world.
There's nothing enlightened about shrinking
So that other people won't feel insecure around you.
We are all meant to shine,
As children do.
We were born to make manifest
The glory of God that is within us.
It's not just in some of us;
It's in everyone.
And as we let our own light shine,
We unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.
As we're liberated from our own fear,
Our presence automatically liberates others.
Wednesday, July 29, 2009
The Gift of Giving
So many of us Christian and Non-Christian have gifts that we don't use. We are so caught up in day to day life that we don't consider that using the gifts that God has given us may be the way to solve a lot of our problems i.e. financial,unhappiness. Working is good don't get me wrong but I think that while we are working we should be taking steps to accomplish our dreams. I say what I'm saying to myself the most. I sing, I write, I have ideas for inventions and businesses etc. At times I have had so many ideas I have gotten overwhelmed (I have learned writing them down helps).
In Habakkuk 2:2 the bible says "And the Lord answered me, and said, write the vision, and make it plain upon tables, that he may run that readeth it".
Writing ideas down helps because it gets them out. I write my ideas down and then I go back to them when it is time). Right now if I sing its around the house, my business ideas and inventions are written down (from time to time I try something to get them out like writing companies).
The bible says in Romans 11:29 For the gifts and calling of God are without repentance. so it is up to us to use our gifts for the purpose God intended them. Lately I have had the inclination to write a book. I think I'll start today, this is definitely the season for it.
Friday, July 17, 2009
Sweet Confirmation
I visited a relative of mine today and she confirmed a word that God had given to me and another relative last week by scripture. It is so wonderful when God reassures us about what he had spoken or laid on our hearts by confirmation. The scripture was Psalms 37. God is Good.
What the Bible says about confirmation: Matthew 18:16 But if he will not hear [thee, then] take with thee one or two more, that in the mouth of two or three witnesses every word may be established.
What the Bible says about confirmation: Matthew 18:16 But if he will not hear [thee, then] take with thee one or two more, that in the mouth of two or three witnesses every word may be established.
Monday, July 13, 2009
The Bucket List
I was talking with a relative of mine the other day about the movie The Bucket List.
The Bucket List stars Jack Nicholson and Morgan Freeman and is about two terminally ill patients that meet in a cancer ward who form a friendship. During their stay in the hospital one of the patients comes across a list created by the other patient. The list is a list of things that the patient wants to do before dying. The patients talk about the list and then collaborate to write a list together. Talking about the movie made me think of a similar list I created in high school. Some may think it morbid but dying is something we all will do and since tomorrow is not promised it would serve us best to live life accordingly. After seeing the movie I decided to come up with a new list. Here it goes:
1. Live the kind of life in which people know that I know God without my ever having to say I do or displaying it religiously i.e. with tee shirts etc. (don’t get me wrong if you choose to wear religious tee-shirts more power to you, what I am saying is if I don’t wear a tee-shirt I want people to still know I believe in Christ)
2. Orchestrate special moments and events that my children will tell their children’s children about with excitement still present. I use to do things with my children like make giant pancakes, make up my own bedtime stories etc. when talking about things that have happened those are the times that my children talk the most about. I want to get back to that.
3. Travel the world.
4. Make a positive difference in the lives of as many as I can.
5. Change my community for the better.
6. Go on a shopping spree to various hot spots i.e. New York, Italy, etc.
7. Go to a Broadway Show.
8. Sit down with my children and let them look at amusement parks and places they want to go and take them to all of them one summer.
9. Travel going to see various plays…Tyler Perry plays namely.
10. Loose weight and keep it off.
11. Hold my great grandchildren.
12. Find a church home and become involved.
13. Become prissy (not the damsel in distress type prissy but doing things like keeping my hair done and my nails manicured and toes pedicured.
14.Publish a book
15.Make a cd
1. Live the kind of life in which people know that I know God without my ever having to say I do or displaying it religiously i.e. with tee shirts etc. (don’t get me wrong if you choose to wear religious tee-shirts more power to you, what I am saying is if I don’t wear a tee-shirt I want people to still know I believe in Christ)
2. Orchestrate special moments and events that my children will tell their children’s children about with excitement still present. I use to do things with my children like make giant pancakes, make up my own bedtime stories etc. when talking about things that have happened those are the times that my children talk the most about. I want to get back to that.
3. Travel the world.
4. Make a positive difference in the lives of as many as I can.
5. Change my community for the better.
6. Go on a shopping spree to various hot spots i.e. New York, Italy, etc.
7. Go to a Broadway Show.
8. Sit down with my children and let them look at amusement parks and places they want to go and take them to all of them one summer.
9. Travel going to see various plays…Tyler Perry plays namely.
10. Loose weight and keep it off.
11. Hold my great grandchildren.
12. Find a church home and become involved.
13. Become prissy (not the damsel in distress type prissy but doing things like keeping my hair done and my nails manicured and toes pedicured.
14.Publish a book
15.Make a cd
Sunday, July 5, 2009
Friday, July 3, 2009
Cleanlines Is Next To Godliness
Although the saying "Cleanliness is next to Godliness" cannot be found in scripture I have found it to be true in my life. This morning I cleaned my bathroom from top to bottom; keeping a clean home is something I always did in the past. Lately I have not been keeping my home as clean as I should. My cousin and I had a conversation about cleaning once and I told her that how clean I keep my home is a reflection on what is going on in my life. When I am relatively happy and I am praying daily, I keep a clean home but when I am depressed, not going to church as I should, and not praying as I should I have the attitude like "I am the queen of the junk pile"; I don't have the energy or desire to clean during those times. When my house is clean at times I find myself just singing or starting to pray to the Lord spontaneously. I looked for a scripture about cleanliness and found this one in
2 Corinthians 7:1 7:1 Having therefore these promises, dearly beloved, let us cleanse ourselves from all filthiness of the flesh and spirit, perfecting holiness in the fear of God. I will push myself to clean from now on. If I start out by cleaning (thoroughly cleaning) one room per day I will but I have often found that when you start you find yourself doing more than you thought you would or could.
2 Corinthians 7:1 7:1 Having therefore these promises, dearly beloved, let us cleanse ourselves from all filthiness of the flesh and spirit, perfecting holiness in the fear of God. I will push myself to clean from now on. If I start out by cleaning (thoroughly cleaning) one room per day I will but I have often found that when you start you find yourself doing more than you thought you would or could.
Wednesday, July 1, 2009
Famous Quotes
It is not well for a man to pray cream and live skim milk.
- Henry Ward Beecher
Prayer moves the hand that moves the world. - John Aikman Wallace
Prayer changes things. - Anonymous
Prayer does not change God, but it changes him who prays. - Soren Kierkegaard
God shapes the world by prayer. Prayers are deathless. They outlive the lives of those who uttered them. - E. M. Bounds
Men of God are always men of prayer. - Henry T. Mahan
All who have walked with God have viewed prayer as the main business of their lives. - Delma Jackson
He who ceases to pray ceases to prosper. - Sir William Gurney Benham
The whole meaning of prayer is that we may know God. - Oswald Chambers
The only way to pray is to pray, and the way to pray well is to pray much. - Anonymous
The less I pray, the harder it gets; the more I pray, the better it goes. - Martin Luther
If we are willing to spend hours on end to learn to play the piano, operate a computer, or fly an airplane, it is sheer nonsense for us to imagine that we can learn the high art of getting guidance through communion with the Lord without being willing to set aside time for it. - Paul Rees
When you cannot pray as you would, pray as you can. - Edward M. Goulburn
Prayer should be the key of the day and the lock of the night. - Thomas Fuller
Seven days without prayer makes one weak. - Allen E. Bartlett
Evening, and morning, and at noon, will I pray. -Bible
Time spent in prayer is never wasted. - Francois de Fenelon
Prayer begins where human capacity ends. - Marian Anderson
Many people pray as if God were a big aspirin pill; they come only when they hurt. - B. Graham Dienert
You pray in your distress and in your need; would that you might also pray in the fullness of your joy and in your days of abundance. - Kahlil Gibran
Don't pray when it rains if you don't pray when the sun shines. - Satchel Paige
When you enter your secret chamber, take plenty of time before you begin to speak. Let quietude wield its influence upon you. Let the fact that you are alone assert itself. Give your soul time to get released from the many outward things. Give God time to play the prelude to prayer for the benefit of your distracted soul. - O. Hallesby
There is no need to get to a place of prayer; pray wherever you are. - Oswald Chambers
Without the incense of heartfelt prayer, even the greatest of cathedrals is dead. - Anonymous
We must lay before him what is in us, not what ought to be in us. - C. S. Lewis
Prayer is a serious thing. We may be taken at our words. - Dwight L. Moody
My words fly up, my thoughts remain below; Words without thoughts never to heaven go. - William Shakespeare
Be not hot in prayer and cold in praise. - Anonymous
Prayer is something deeper than words. It is present in the soul before it has been formulated in words. And it abides in the soul after the last words of prayer have passed over our lips. - O. Hallesby
God prefers bad verses recited with a pure heart to the finest verses chanted by the wicked. - Voltaire
The best prayers have often more groans than words. - John Bunyan
Our groanings, which cannot be uttered, rise to Him and tell Him better than words how dependent we are upon Him. - O. Hallesby
Many words do not a good prayer make; what counts is the heartfelt desire to commune with God, and the faith to back it up. - Anonymous
Prayer is not asking. It is a longing of the soul. - Mahatma Gandhi
Prayer in the sense of petition, asking for things, is a small part of it; confession and penitence are its threshold, adoration its sanctuary, the presence and vision and enjoyment of God its bread and wine. ->C. S. Lewis
He who prays for his neighbors will be heard for himself. - Talmud
No one who has had a unique experience with prayer has a right to withhold it from others. - Soong Mei-ling
God receives little thanks, even for his greatest gifts. - Anonymous
We are going home to many who cannot read. So, Lord, make us to be Bibles so that those who cannot read the Book can read it in us. - Anonymous Chinese woman
firmly believe a great many prayers are not answered because we are not willing to forgive someone. >Dwight L. Moody
It is vain to expect our prayers to be heard if we do not strive as well as pray. - Aesop
Help yourself and heaven will help you. - Jean de la Fontaine
God gives the nuts, but he does not crack them. - German proverb
There are four ways God answers prayer: No, not yet; No, I love you too much; Yes, I thought you'd never ask; Yes, and here's more. - >Anne Lewis
God's chief gift to those who seek him is Himself. - E. B. Pusey
Prayer enlarges the heart until it is capable of containing God's gift of Himself. - Mother Teresa
The man who prays grows, and the muscles of the soul swell from this whipcord to iron bands. F. B. Meyer
Prayer opens our eyes that we may see ourselves and others as God sees us. - Clara Palmer
It is impossible to lose your footing while on your knees. - Anonymous
Prayer is the spiritual gymnasium in which we exercise and practice godliness. - V. L. Crawford
Prayer is exhaling the spirit of man and inhaling the spirit of God. - Edwin Keith
How to make God laugh? Tell him your future plans. - <Woody Allen
I like your Christ, do not like your Christians. Your Christians are so unlike your Christ.>Mohandas Gandhi
Prayer moves the hand that moves the world. - John Aikman Wallace
Prayer changes things. - Anonymous
Prayer does not change God, but it changes him who prays. - Soren Kierkegaard
God shapes the world by prayer. Prayers are deathless. They outlive the lives of those who uttered them. - E. M. Bounds
Men of God are always men of prayer. - Henry T. Mahan
All who have walked with God have viewed prayer as the main business of their lives. - Delma Jackson
He who ceases to pray ceases to prosper. - Sir William Gurney Benham
The whole meaning of prayer is that we may know God. - Oswald Chambers
The only way to pray is to pray, and the way to pray well is to pray much. - Anonymous
The less I pray, the harder it gets; the more I pray, the better it goes. - Martin Luther
If we are willing to spend hours on end to learn to play the piano, operate a computer, or fly an airplane, it is sheer nonsense for us to imagine that we can learn the high art of getting guidance through communion with the Lord without being willing to set aside time for it. - Paul Rees
When you cannot pray as you would, pray as you can. - Edward M. Goulburn
Prayer should be the key of the day and the lock of the night. - Thomas Fuller
Seven days without prayer makes one weak. - Allen E. Bartlett
Evening, and morning, and at noon, will I pray. -
Time spent in prayer is never wasted. - Francois de Fenelon
Prayer begins where human capacity ends. - Marian Anderson
Many people pray as if God were a big aspirin pill; they come only when they hurt. - B. Graham Dienert
You pray in your distress and in your need; would that you might also pray in the fullness of your joy and in your days of abundance. - Kahlil Gibran
Don't pray when it rains if you don't pray when the sun shines. - Satchel Paige
When you enter your secret chamber, take plenty of time before you begin to speak. Let quietude wield its influence upon you. Let the fact that you are alone assert itself. Give your soul time to get released from the many outward things. Give God time to play the prelude to prayer for the benefit of your distracted soul. - O. Hallesby
There is no need to get to a place of prayer; pray wherever you are. - Oswald Chambers
Without the incense of heartfelt prayer, even the greatest of cathedrals is dead. - Anonymous
We must lay before him what is in us, not what ought to be in us. - C. S. Lewis
Prayer is a serious thing. We may be taken at our words. - Dwight L. Moody
My words fly up, my thoughts remain below; Words without thoughts never to heaven go. - William Shakespeare
Be not hot in prayer and cold in praise. - Anonymous
Prayer is something deeper than words. It is present in the soul before it has been formulated in words. And it abides in the soul after the last words of prayer have passed over our lips. - O. Hallesby
God prefers bad verses recited with a pure heart to the finest verses chanted by the wicked. - Voltaire
The best prayers have often more groans than words. - John Bunyan
Our groanings, which cannot be uttered, rise to Him and tell Him better than words how dependent we are upon Him. - O. Hallesby
Many words do not a good prayer make; what counts is the heartfelt desire to commune with God, and the faith to back it up. - Anonymous
Prayer is not asking. It is a longing of the soul. - Mahatma Gandhi
Prayer in the sense of petition, asking for things, is a small part of it; confession and penitence are its threshold, adoration its sanctuary, the presence and vision and enjoyment of God its bread and wine. -
He who prays for his neighbors will be heard for himself. - Talmud
No one who has had a unique experience with prayer has a right to withhold it from others. - Soong Mei-ling
God receives little thanks, even for his greatest gifts. - Anonymous
We are going home to many who cannot read. So, Lord, make us to be Bibles so that those who cannot read the Book can read it in us. - Anonymous Chinese woman
firmly believe a great many prayers are not answered because we are not willing to forgive someone. >Dwight L. Moody
It is vain to expect our prayers to be heard if we do not strive as well as pray. - Aesop
Help yourself and heaven will help you. - Jean de la Fontaine
God gives the nuts, but he does not crack them. - German proverb
There are four ways God answers prayer: No, not yet; No, I love you too much; Yes, I thought you'd never ask; Yes, and here's more. - >Anne Lewis
God's chief gift to those who seek him is Himself. - E. B. Pusey
Prayer enlarges the heart until it is capable of containing God's gift of Himself. - Mother Teresa
The man who prays grows, and the muscles of the soul swell from this whipcord to iron bands. F. B. Meyer
Prayer opens our eyes that we may see ourselves and others as God sees us. - Clara Palmer
It is impossible to lose your footing while on your knees. - Anonymous
Prayer is the spiritual gymnasium in which we exercise and practice godliness. - V. L. Crawford
Prayer is exhaling the spirit of man and inhaling the spirit of God. - Edwin Keith
How to make God laugh? Tell him your future plans. - <Woody Allen
I like your Christ, do not like your Christians. Your Christians are so unlike your Christ.>Mohandas Gandhi
Monday, June 29, 2009
The Spirit of Music
Sunday Morning while I was riding in the car an old gospel song that I liked came on. After hearing the familiar melody a wind of peace engulfed me. I sang along which intensified the feeling the song was giving off. After hearing the song I was reminded of a conference I had gone to. In the conference the speaker spoke on the effects of music. I will always remember that conference; there was a hail storm the day after (very unusual). The speaker talked about Lucifer being in charge of the music in heaven and how he continued to use his gift after being cast out. The speaker spoke about how heavy metal exalted the devil and how the devil used rap for African Americans (rap now crosses the color barriers). The speaker showed us slides of some of the lyrics of songs etc. it was mind blowing to see some of the things I had been dancing and listening to. People are so caught up in the beat and rhythm of the song that sometimes we don't pay close enough attention to the words. In the end he challenged us to do a 3 day fast with no tv or radio. During the 3 days I sang songs I did not even know that I liked and I couldn't stop singing them. I have since gone back to listening to secular music. Cutting out secular music has been a battle for me. Music is one of my strongest giftings and I have found it difficult to not listen to it all. I do believe it is necessary for me to cut out secular music because music is so powerful...it changes your very mood. When you listen to a happy song it brings back happy memories. When you listen to sad songs you think on sad times. When you listen to love songs...well you get the gist of what I am saying. As a Christian I feel we should listen to music that feeds our spirit and helps us in our walk with Christ. I await the day when my desire is only to hear music that edifies.
Saturday, June 27, 2009
The Color of Love,The Family of God
While walking the other day at a near by park I saw a little boy who happened to be Caucasian playing; I thought nothing of it then I heard him call out "ma" the only lady that was near him was African American. I was focused on exercising so I didn't think anything of it so I just continued to walk by and as I did he saw me and kindly said "hello"...I spoke back and continued on my walk. After I finished walking I let my little girl who had come with me play on the playground. The little boy who I had seen earlier had began to approach a group of African American children apprehensively, they waved for him to come join them and they began to play on the merry go round. While playing one of the little kids asked him "where's your momma at?" He replied "she's right there" pointing to the African American lady who had been there with him all along; "oh...really?" she asked "yeah" replied the boy and they continued to play. I sat there enjoying the moment for the longest watching the children play with no regard to their differences; it was beautiful and innocent. Years ago while watching a game show I found myself rooting for an African American lady (I am African American) and God began to convict me. "Why do you want her to win?" was the question he spoke to my spirit. I did not respond and I didn't need to; God had searched my heart and exposed something within it that even I did not know was there. He then spoke to my spirit "that lady could be a murderer, a child molester...you don't know; just because the two of you have the same color skin doesn't mean you're anything alike; you could have way more in common with the white male or female." I really began to rethink things after that day. I had always considered myself open minded; I was educated and had traveled overseas and that exposure really caused me to befriend all races. Still God had found hidden, silent traces of the residue of racism in my heart. During the Presidential Election I knew that racism would rare its head but I saw it in some people I never would have expected to see it in and it hurted. As we as a Nation and the Body of Christ are exposed to more diversity and as color barriers are being broken. I pray that we will begin to judge people as one man of insight so eloquently put it "by our character" and as one far greater than us all tried to teach us...by the spirit.
2 Corinthians
5:16
Wherefore henceforth know we no man after the flesh: yea, though we have known Christ after the flesh, yet now henceforth know we [him] no more.
Romans
8:9
But ye are not in the flesh, but in the Spirit, if so be that the Spirit of God dwell in you. Now if any man have not the Spirit of Christ, he is none of his.
1John
4:20 If a man say, I love God, and hateth his brother, he is a liar: for he that loveth not his brother whom he hath seen, how can he love God whom he hath not seen?
Mark
3:35 For whosoever shall do the will of God, the same is my brother, and my sister, and mother
Names of God
El Shaddai- God All Suffient
Jehovah Jireh- The Lord Will Provide
Jehovah Nissi- The Lord My Victory Banner
Jehovah Rapha- The Lord My Healer
Jehovah Tisdkenu- The Lord My Righteousness
Jehovah Shalom-The Lord My Peace
Immanuel- God With Us
Jehovah Jireh- The Lord Will Provide
Jehovah Rapha- The Lord My Healer
Jehovah Tisdkenu- The Lord My Righteousness
Jehovah Shalom-The Lord My Peace
Immanuel- God With Us
Tuesday, June 23, 2009
Biblical Baby Names
Aaron = exalted, enlightened
Abarrane = Hebrew, feminine form of Abraham, father of many
Abelia = Hebrew, breath, sigh
Abigail = father’s joy
Adam = mankind
Alon = oak tree
Amy = my nation, my people
Andrew = manly, warrior
Anna = gracious
Benjamin = Son of the right hand
Chloe = young green shoot, blooming
Dalia = branch
Daniel = God is my judge
David = beloved
Deborah = bee
Dina = judged
Elana = tree
Eli = ascend
Elijah = the Lord is my God
Elizabeth = God is my oath
Ester = star
Ethan = strong
Eve = life
Ezekiel = God will strengthen
Felix = happy, fortunate prosperous
Gabrielle = God is my strength
Hannah = grace of God
Helsa = devoted to God
Ilana = tree
Isaac = He will laugh
Isaiah = God is my salvation
Israel = struggles with God
Jacob = held by the heel
Jael = to ascend, mountain goat
James = held by the heel
Jeremiah = God will raise up
Jessica = God sees
Joel = God is willing
John = God gave
Jonah = dove
Jordan = to flow down
Joseph = God adds, he will increase
Joshua = God is my salvation
Judah = praise
Judith = praise
Karen = pure
Kirsten = Christ’s follower
Leah = weary
Levi = joined
Malachi = messenger
Manasseh = causing to forget
Matthew = gift of God
Marcus = warlike
Michael = who is like God
Michelle = who is like God
Miriam = bitter
Mordecai = warrior
Moses = drawn out of the water
Nathan = God has given
Nehemiah = comforted by the Lord
Noah = rest
Rachel = lamb
Raphael = God has healed
Rebecca = to tie
Rubin = behold a son
Samson = sun
Samuel = God has heard
Sharon = a fertile plain
Simon = to hear
Solomon = his peace
Stephen = crown
Tamara = palm tree
Abarrane = Hebrew, feminine form of Abraham, father of many
Abelia = Hebrew, breath, sigh
Abigail = father’s joy
Adam = mankind
Alon = oak tree
Amy = my nation, my people
Andrew = manly, warrior
Anna = gracious
Benjamin = Son of the right hand
Chloe = young green shoot, blooming
Dalia = branch
Daniel = God is my judge
David = beloved
Deborah = bee
Dina = judged
Elana = tree
Eli = ascend
Elijah = the Lord is my God
Elizabeth = God is my oath
Ester = star
Ethan = strong
Eve = life
Ezekiel = God will strengthen
Felix = happy, fortunate prosperous
Gabrielle = God is my strength
Hannah = grace of God
Helsa = devoted to God
Ilana = tree
Isaac = He will laugh
Isaiah = God is my salvation
Israel = struggles with God
Jacob = held by the heel
Jael = to ascend, mountain goat
James = held by the heel
Jeremiah = God will raise up
Jessica = God sees
Joel = God is willing
John = God gave
Jonah = dove
Jordan = to flow down
Joseph = God adds, he will increase
Joshua = God is my salvation
Judah = praise
Judith = praise
Karen = pure
Kirsten = Christ’s follower
Leah = weary
Levi = joined
Malachi = messenger
Manasseh = causing to forget
Matthew = gift of God
Marcus = warlike
Michael = who is like God
Michelle = who is like God
Miriam = bitter
Mordecai = warrior
Moses = drawn out of the water
Nathan = God has given
Nehemiah = comforted by the Lord
Noah = rest
Rachel = lamb
Raphael = God has healed
Rebecca = to tie
Rubin = behold a son
Samson = sun
Samuel = God has heard
Sharon = a fertile plain
Simon = to hear
Solomon = his peace
Stephen = crown
Tamara = palm tree
Saturday, June 20, 2009
The Joy of The Lord Is Our Strength/Christian Jokes
The Athiest in the Woods
An atheist was walking through the woods, thinking to himself,
"How beautiful the animals are!" "How majestic the trees are!" "How powerful the rivers are!"
As he walked along the river, he heard rustling in the bushes behind him.
He turned and saw an 8-foot grizzly bear charging towards him.
He ran along the path as fast as he could, but when he looked over his shoulder, he saw that the bear was closing in on him.
He kept running, but when he looked over his shoulder again, and the bear was even closer.
Then he tripped and fell on the ground.
The bear was right on top of him with his right paw raised to strike him.
At that instant, the atheist cried, "God help me!"
Time Stopped.
The bear froze.
The forest was silent.
A bright light shone upon the man and a voice from the sky said, "You've denied my existence for all these years and have taught others that I don't exist.
You've even credited creation to a cosmic accident.
Why would you expect me to help you out of this predicament? Are you now a believer?"
The atheist looked into the light and said, "Well, I would be hypocrite to suddenly ask You to treat me as a Christian now, but could you, maybe, make the BEAR a Christian?"
"Very Well," said the voice.
The light went out.
The sounds of the forest resumed.
The bear lowered his right paw and brought both paws together.
He bowed his head, and said: "Lord, bless this food which I am about to receive from Your bounty through Christ our Lord, Amen."
Shall we gather at the river?
A preacher, completing a temperance sermon, spoke with great fervor! "If I had all the beer in the world, I’d throw it all into the river."
With greater emphasis, he said, "And if I had all the wine in the world, I’d throw it all into the river."
And finally he said, "And if I had all the whiskey in the world, I’d throw it all into the river, too!"
As he took his chair, the song leader stood and announced with a smile, "For our closing hymn, let us sing number 365:
"Shall We Gather at the River."
Holy Water
One Sunday morning a minister and a choirboy were getting the church ready for mass.
The minister prepared his sermon while the choirboy filled the holy water fountain.
Suddenly, the choirboy burst into the minister's room and yelled,
"father father, I just saw the most amazing thing! I filled the holy water fountain. Then a man came in on crutches.
He moved to the fountain, dipped his left hand in the holy water, blessed himself and threw away his left crutch.
Then he dipped his right hand in the holy water, blessed himself and threw away his right crutch.
Then he turned to me ... and he took a step forward"!
The minister was awe struck by what he just heard.
"My boy, he said, you just witnessed a miracle from God!Where's this man now?"
The Choirboy replies..."flat on his face in front of the holy water fountain"!
A Miracle?
Father O'Malley was driving down to Boston when got stopped for speeding in Medford.
The highway patrol officer smelled alcohol on the priest's breath and then saw an empty wine bottle on the floor of the car.
He said, 'Father, have you been drinking?'
'Only water', replied Father O'Malley.
The policeman asked, 'Then how come I can smell wine?'
The priest looked at the bottle and said, 'Good Lord! He's done it again.'
Brewing Coffee
A man and his wife were having an argument about who should brew the coffee each morning.
The wife said, "You should do it, because you get up first, and then we don't have to wait as long to get our coffee".
The husband said, " You are in charge of the cooking around here and you should do it, because that is your job, and I can just wait for my coffee."
Wife replies, "No you should do it, and besides it is in the Bible that the man should do the coffee."
Husband replies, " I can't believe that, show me."
So she fetched the Bible, and opened the New Testament and shows him at the top of several pages, that it indeed says: “HEBREWS”
SUNDAY SCHOOL
One day in Sunday school, the teacher was talking about Jesus is to the kids, "Bobby, where is Jesus?" asked the teacher.
"Jesus is in heaven." replied Bobby.
"Very good!", said the teacher.
The teacher then asked a little girl," Where is Jesus, Emily?".
Emily said innocently, "Jesus is in my heart!".
The teacher beamed at little Emily and said, "How very sweet!!!".
The teacher now asked Timmy, "Timmy, where is Jesus?".
"Jesus is in my bathroom." he said assuredly.
"Please elaborate, Timmy.", the teacher said.
Timmy then replied, "Well, every morning my dad gets up, bangs on the bathroom door and yells. Jesus Christ, are you still in there!!!"
WHOOPS!
A middle-aged woman has a heart attack and is taken to the hospital.
While on the operating table she has a near death experience.
During that experience she sees God and asks if this is it.
God says no and explains that she has another 30 years to live.
Upon her recovery she decides to just stay in the hospital and have a face lift, liposuction, breast augmentation, tummy tuck, etc. She even has someone come in and change her hair color.
She figures since she's got another 30 years she might as well make the most of it.
She walks out of the hospital after the last operation and is killed by an ambulance speeding by.
She arrives in front of God and complains, "I thought you said I had another 30 years."
God replies, "I didn't recognize you."
TIME & ETERNITY
A man was taking it easy, lying on the grass and looking up at the clouds. He was identifying shapes when he decided to talk to God.
"God", he said, "how long is a million years?"
God answered, "In my frame of reference, it's about a minute."
The man asked, "God, how much is a million dollars?"
God answered, "To Me, it's a penny." The man then asked, "God, can I have a penny?"
God said, "In a minute."
THE MISER
There was a man who worked and worked and saved all his money.
Neverspending any of it, just saving it.
He loved money. He was a miser and heworshipped his cash.
For years he kept telling his wife, "when I die, I want you to put mymoney in the casket with me; I want to have it for the afterlife."
The years passed and he kept idolizing his money and telling his wifeto put the money in the casket with him.
He even got a bible out and made his wife swear on the bible that she would put the money in his casket with him.
"Do you promise to put my money in the casket with me when I die?... do you PROMISE?"
"Yes", the wife replied, "I promise to put all your money in your casket with you."
One day the man died and at the funeral the wife sat holding a giftwrapped box. She was sitting with her closest friend and quietly crying.
Just as the funeral director got ready to close the casket the wife jumped up and said, "WAIT, I have something to put in the casket with him."Then she gently placed the box in the casket.
When she returned to her seat her friend asked, "what did you put in the casket?"
The wife answered, "he made me promise that I would put all his money in the casket with him when he died, so that he could have it in the afterlife."
The friend was astonished and said, "I KNOW you didn't do that!!"
The wife looked at her friend and said, "Well, you know I'm a Christian woman and I could not lie to him... so I did as I promised."
Her friend said, "girl, you are crazy!!" "I can't believe you put all the money in the casket with him!!"
The wife quietly dabbed the tears from her eyes and said....I'm a Christian but not a fool...... I wrote him a check if he can cash it he can have it.
THE LITTLE OLD LADY
There was a little old lady, who every morning. stepped ontoher front porch, raised her arms to the sky, and shouted:"PRAISE THE LORD!"
One day an atheist moved into the house next door. Hebecame irritated at the little old lady.
Every morning he'd step onto his front porch after her and yell:"THERE IS NO LORD!"
Time passed with the two of them carrying on this way every day.
One morning, in the middle of winter, the little old lady stepped onto her front porch and shouted:"PRAISE THE LORD! Please Lord, I have no food and Iam starving, provide for me, oh Lord!
The next morning she stepped onto her porch and there were two huge bags of groceries sitting there.
"PRAISE THE LORD!" she cried out. "HE HAS PROVIDED GROCERIES FOR ME!"
The atheist neighbor jumped out of the hedges and shouted:"THERE IS NO LORD. I BOUGHT THOSE GROCERIES!!"
The little old lady threw her arms into the air and shouted:"PRAISE THE LORD! HE HAS PROVIDED ME WITHGROCERIES AND MADE THE DEVIL PAY FOR THEM!
PARKING
A minister parked his car in a no-parking zone in a large citybecause he was short of time and couldn't find a space witha meter.
So he put a note under the windshield wiper that read: "I have circled the block 10 times. If I don't park here, I'll miss my appointment. FORGIVE US OUR TRESPASSES."
When he returned, he found a citation from a police officer along with this note.
"I've circled this block for 10 years. If I don't give you a ticket, I'll lose my job. LEAD US NOT INTO TEMPTATION."
An atheist was walking through the woods, thinking to himself,
"How beautiful the animals are!" "How majestic the trees are!" "How powerful the rivers are!"
As he walked along the river, he heard rustling in the bushes behind him.
He turned and saw an 8-foot grizzly bear charging towards him.
He ran along the path as fast as he could, but when he looked over his shoulder, he saw that the bear was closing in on him.
He kept running, but when he looked over his shoulder again, and the bear was even closer.
Then he tripped and fell on the ground.
The bear was right on top of him with his right paw raised to strike him.
At that instant, the atheist cried, "God help me!"
Time Stopped.
The bear froze.
The forest was silent.
A bright light shone upon the man and a voice from the sky said, "You've denied my existence for all these years and have taught others that I don't exist.
You've even credited creation to a cosmic accident.
Why would you expect me to help you out of this predicament? Are you now a believer?"
The atheist looked into the light and said, "Well, I would be hypocrite to suddenly ask You to treat me as a Christian now, but could you, maybe, make the BEAR a Christian?"
"Very Well," said the voice.
The light went out.
The sounds of the forest resumed.
The bear lowered his right paw and brought both paws together.
He bowed his head, and said: "Lord, bless this food which I am about to receive from Your bounty through Christ our Lord, Amen."
Shall we gather at the river?
A preacher, completing a temperance sermon, spoke with great fervor! "If I had all the beer in the world, I’d throw it all into the river."
With greater emphasis, he said, "And if I had all the wine in the world, I’d throw it all into the river."
And finally he said, "And if I had all the whiskey in the world, I’d throw it all into the river, too!"
As he took his chair, the song leader stood and announced with a smile, "For our closing hymn, let us sing number 365:
"Shall We Gather at the River."
Holy Water
One Sunday morning a minister and a choirboy were getting the church ready for mass.
The minister prepared his sermon while the choirboy filled the holy water fountain.
Suddenly, the choirboy burst into the minister's room and yelled,
"father father, I just saw the most amazing thing! I filled the holy water fountain. Then a man came in on crutches.
He moved to the fountain, dipped his left hand in the holy water, blessed himself and threw away his left crutch.
Then he dipped his right hand in the holy water, blessed himself and threw away his right crutch.
Then he turned to me ... and he took a step forward"!
The minister was awe struck by what he just heard.
"My boy, he said, you just witnessed a miracle from God!Where's this man now?"
The Choirboy replies..."flat on his face in front of the holy water fountain"!
A Miracle?
Father O'Malley was driving down to Boston when got stopped for speeding in Medford.
The highway patrol officer smelled alcohol on the priest's breath and then saw an empty wine bottle on the floor of the car.
He said, 'Father, have you been drinking?'
'Only water', replied Father O'Malley.
The policeman asked, 'Then how come I can smell wine?'
The priest looked at the bottle and said, 'Good Lord! He's done it again.'
Brewing Coffee
A man and his wife were having an argument about who should brew the coffee each morning.
The wife said, "You should do it, because you get up first, and then we don't have to wait as long to get our coffee".
The husband said, " You are in charge of the cooking around here and you should do it, because that is your job, and I can just wait for my coffee."
Wife replies, "No you should do it, and besides it is in the Bible that the man should do the coffee."
Husband replies, " I can't believe that, show me."
So she fetched the Bible, and opened the New Testament and shows him at the top of several pages, that it indeed says: “HEBREWS”
SUNDAY SCHOOL
One day in Sunday school, the teacher was talking about Jesus is to the kids, "Bobby, where is Jesus?" asked the teacher.
"Jesus is in heaven." replied Bobby.
"Very good!", said the teacher.
The teacher then asked a little girl," Where is Jesus, Emily?".
Emily said innocently, "Jesus is in my heart!".
The teacher beamed at little Emily and said, "How very sweet!!!".
The teacher now asked Timmy, "Timmy, where is Jesus?".
"Jesus is in my bathroom." he said assuredly.
"Please elaborate, Timmy.", the teacher said.
Timmy then replied, "Well, every morning my dad gets up, bangs on the bathroom door and yells. Jesus Christ, are you still in there!!!"
WHOOPS!
A middle-aged woman has a heart attack and is taken to the hospital.
While on the operating table she has a near death experience.
During that experience she sees God and asks if this is it.
God says no and explains that she has another 30 years to live.
Upon her recovery she decides to just stay in the hospital and have a face lift, liposuction, breast augmentation, tummy tuck, etc. She even has someone come in and change her hair color.
She figures since she's got another 30 years she might as well make the most of it.
She walks out of the hospital after the last operation and is killed by an ambulance speeding by.
She arrives in front of God and complains, "I thought you said I had another 30 years."
God replies, "I didn't recognize you."
TIME & ETERNITY
A man was taking it easy, lying on the grass and looking up at the clouds. He was identifying shapes when he decided to talk to God.
"God", he said, "how long is a million years?"
God answered, "In my frame of reference, it's about a minute."
The man asked, "God, how much is a million dollars?"
God answered, "To Me, it's a penny." The man then asked, "God, can I have a penny?"
God said, "In a minute."
THE MISER
There was a man who worked and worked and saved all his money.
Neverspending any of it, just saving it.
He loved money. He was a miser and heworshipped his cash.
For years he kept telling his wife, "when I die, I want you to put mymoney in the casket with me; I want to have it for the afterlife."
The years passed and he kept idolizing his money and telling his wifeto put the money in the casket with him.
He even got a bible out and made his wife swear on the bible that she would put the money in his casket with him.
"Do you promise to put my money in the casket with me when I die?... do you PROMISE?"
"Yes", the wife replied, "I promise to put all your money in your casket with you."
One day the man died and at the funeral the wife sat holding a giftwrapped box. She was sitting with her closest friend and quietly crying.
Just as the funeral director got ready to close the casket the wife jumped up and said, "WAIT, I have something to put in the casket with him."Then she gently placed the box in the casket.
When she returned to her seat her friend asked, "what did you put in the casket?"
The wife answered, "he made me promise that I would put all his money in the casket with him when he died, so that he could have it in the afterlife."
The friend was astonished and said, "I KNOW you didn't do that!!"
The wife looked at her friend and said, "Well, you know I'm a Christian woman and I could not lie to him... so I did as I promised."
Her friend said, "girl, you are crazy!!" "I can't believe you put all the money in the casket with him!!"
The wife quietly dabbed the tears from her eyes and said....I'm a Christian but not a fool...... I wrote him a check if he can cash it he can have it.
THE LITTLE OLD LADY
There was a little old lady, who every morning. stepped ontoher front porch, raised her arms to the sky, and shouted:"PRAISE THE LORD!"
One day an atheist moved into the house next door. Hebecame irritated at the little old lady.
Every morning he'd step onto his front porch after her and yell:"THERE IS NO LORD!"
Time passed with the two of them carrying on this way every day.
One morning, in the middle of winter, the little old lady stepped onto her front porch and shouted:"PRAISE THE LORD! Please Lord, I have no food and Iam starving, provide for me, oh Lord!
The next morning she stepped onto her porch and there were two huge bags of groceries sitting there.
"PRAISE THE LORD!" she cried out. "HE HAS PROVIDED GROCERIES FOR ME!"
The atheist neighbor jumped out of the hedges and shouted:"THERE IS NO LORD. I BOUGHT THOSE GROCERIES!!"
The little old lady threw her arms into the air and shouted:"PRAISE THE LORD! HE HAS PROVIDED ME WITHGROCERIES AND MADE THE DEVIL PAY FOR THEM!
PARKING
A minister parked his car in a no-parking zone in a large citybecause he was short of time and couldn't find a space witha meter.
So he put a note under the windshield wiper that read: "I have circled the block 10 times. If I don't park here, I'll miss my appointment. FORGIVE US OUR TRESPASSES."
When he returned, he found a citation from a police officer along with this note.
"I've circled this block for 10 years. If I don't give you a ticket, I'll lose my job. LEAD US NOT INTO TEMPTATION."
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