Monday, November 14, 2011
Transformed: A Made Up Mind
I went to a conference Saturday and one of the speakers was Elder Savage. Elder Savage,delivered a powerful word that seemed tailor made for me. God is beautiful in that he always makes you feel special; it could be a sunset or a red bird and I can't help but say thank you Lord for the sunset etc. It's like he made it just for me. Elder Savage's message was on Obedience; she said to answer the call and quench not the Spirit. The message changed something in me. I heard " I am moving the debris that has stopped up your dam, the devil wants you immobile but I am unstopping your dam, out of your belly will flow and rush rivers of living water".She began to pray and God told me to get up and I was reluctant at first but I am so glad I did. As she prayed for me I saw a vision of myself as a child with my hands over my mouth. Elder Savage said "you are like a locked up dam, you are locked up". I began to wail and then I unconsciously began to cover my mouth. As I sat down I made up my mind to switch. I participated in worship like I haven't for a long time, uninhibited. Pain normally makes me shut down and I had been going through some things but last night I made up my mind to be free. Free to worship, free to praise, free to dance (the dance part is a prophecy right now but it's coming) free to offer my gifts to the body of Christ, free to love without fear, free to touch, hug...whatever(touch had been an issue) free to laugh, clap, shout, or be silent, free to dress up, free to not shrink myself...Free to be ME. Sunday I sang in the choir; I joined Thursday. At first I had to fight my mind; I thought of my imperfections. I questioned myself and I heard God say "just be obedient, I'll work the rest out". It was a huge step to join the choir but God told me it wasn't about me or how I feel. God is coming for his talents. Sunday I sang and felt the urge to retreat, but something in me rose up and said not this time! Reaching my destiny depends on my obedience so today I stand strong and proclaim that "I am an unstopped dam. A mighty River; rushing waters that are being purified as I go."